No one said it would be easy. Actually, no one in my family ever talked about it-- or any music for that matter. I am a sole musician in my family. It started as fooling around on a cast off guitar, and now I am in multiple orchestras, playing weddings solo and in bands-- teaching music four days a week--40 students. It is always a rush, but there is never a rest.
We are always rusting!
I have to keep up the chops and remained focus. I have music to learn-- no creativity just productivity. And yes, it is NOT easy! It is also not fun to look at the lineage I am up against: 450 years of violin history with amazing players etched into stone over the centuries. Libraries filled with books and reference material for all of the music composed and all of the guides on how to play it, and the instrument it is written for right. It is unending!
But that is great! Information is a sea I love to swim in--- if it didn't drown me constantly.
So I keep on a constant search for a "better way", while using any "way" that is within grasp in the meantime. That is the secret-- stay on the path although you seriously doubt it and you are never satisfied.
Satisfaction? In classical music, that doesn't exist. Kind of like perfection in ballet. I am sure there is good enough-- or, "I will let you get by with that", but perfection and satisfaction is a signed resignation. We love the classic arts because we will never get it the way we think it should be or we want it. We still have to try-- every day and with every bit of effort.
Yeah, it is a long road. It is waiting for Godot. Still a good play right? That banter in the middle is interesting... like the movie "Before Sunrise". The experience of being in a predicament together with like-minded people is what life is all about. We are all playing catch up...
